At the very beginning of 2019, I lost someone so near and dear to my heart.......my beloved mother. My sisters and I were devastated. During this time I also was dealing with postpartum depression from having my daughter June of 2018.
It has now been about 7 months since I lost my mom and my daughter is now 1 years old. I often asked myself how do you grieve death and be joyous for life at the same time? So many emotions all at one time that I started to become numb. I didn't know how to feel. On the outside, I was numb. On the inside, I was disturbed and emotionally all over the place. I honestly didn't know how to channel my energy and my emotions. Now please believe me when I say, I am still figuring things out but there are a few tips that have helped me to find moments of peace during life's storms.
One thing that has helped me is journaling. My husband brought be a cute little notebook to write down my feelings after my mom passed. He would tell me to just write it exactly how I feel it and it truly has helped in my healing process.
Self meditation and reflection has also helped. I will say grief and serious life changes have a way of helping you see things more clearly. I could see negative people and situations that needed to be removed from my life. Situations or people that I probably would have never noticed if life did not change my prospective on how precious our time is.
Lastly, owning my feelings......all of them. If I am sad, I allowed myself to cry and be sad. For however long I needed to feel that way. If I was angry, scared, lonely, or afraid I owned those feelings and allowed myself to sit in that emotion. You really do not understand how much that is needed for my emotional and mental stability.
I still have a lot to work to do but I wanted to share my journey. Maybe this can help someone, like it has helped me. Someone once said to me "grief is not a destination but a journey and such is life."
-A. Nic <3